Thick Accents
by Robotic Fox
Summary: Archie makes a very interesting discovery about Maxie one day. Post-ORAS. Hardenshipping.


Archie couldn't believe he hadn't noticed it before. You would think after being in a relationship with a person for nearly a year he would've at least caught glimpse of it, but nope. But to give himself the mealiest bit of credit, it wasn't often that Maxie got thoroughly pissed. Sure, Maxie was prickly as a cactus and didn't exactly have the friendliest personality, but he rarely ever got himself too worked up about anything.

Arguments were common courses in their relationship (after all, you didn't put people with personalities as different as theirs together and not expect there to be a fallout or two), but even then, Maxie very rarely raised his voice or got himself angry, seeing as most of the time, Maxie went into the argument thoroughly convinced he was right and that Archie was acting on "childish impulses" again. Most of the time, Maxie's manner of speech was either cold or business-like (leaving no room for argument) or just mildly irritated or frustrated. If you actually got Maxie angry, well, you must have really fucked up and it might be best to run out of the country for a few hours to let him cool down.

Matt and Shelly could agree that Archie very rarely got mad back when he was leading… but both said when he actually did get pissed, it was a scary experience. But even he knew that his anger was nowhere near as dangerous and as volatile as Maxie's. Messing with Maxie when he was angry was like messing around with actual molten lava with your bare hands. If you weren't at all careful, you were going to get burnt… and he would make certain that it would hurt.

He didn't even want to imagine what he had put Courtney and Tabitha through whenever he and the other Aqua members had managed to foil one of Maxie's elaborate plans. He may not know the two very well, but he certainly knew that they were nice and didn't really deserve to have an angry Maxie in their hands. In fact, every time he did have to escape on his Crobat before Maxie made his Camerupt burn him alive, Archie made it a point to buy a set of Lava Cookies and personally deliver it to the Magma Admins himself. They had been confused at first, but once they realized why exactly he was offering it to them, they only gave him sympathetic looks and a few 'good lucks.' Granted, he was pretty sure he heard Tabitha chuckling a couple of times, but he was willing to give the kid the benefit of the doubt… mostly for Matt's sake.

Now, even though Archie had encountered a very peeved off Maxie every once in a while… he had never noticed this little side-effect. Knowing Maxie, he'd probably done his best to keep this hidden from Archie forever. But now that Archie caught him in the act, he was not going to let this go, no matter how mad Maxie was.

Maxie was glaring viciously at the floor, red coloring his pale face, purposely avoiding Archie's gaze. Archie still couldn't tell if the blush had come from anger or embarrassment… probably both now that he thought about it. Either way, Maxie's look was murderous so he had to approach this gently. But how could he not poke fun at this? Knowing the situation Maxie was in, he could possibly poke some fun at the redhead without getting verbally slandered. Opportunities like this only came once in a lifetime, so he might as well take advantage of this.

"Maxie… come on, speak to me again... I like your accent you have there…" Archie teased slowly, slowly sneaking up to the mortified man and brushing his fingers through his boyfriend's red hair, causing the former Magma leader to tense and bristle. A few seconds later he felt his hand get batted away from him, causing him to let out a small laugh.

"Aw, come on Maxie. It's not that bad, all I am going to ask is why you didn't tell me about this in the first place…" Archie said, tugging Maxie over towards his side, making sure his arm was wrapped securely around the skinny man's waist. He knew Maxie was probably wanting to hit him, though his determination to keep his face hidden from Archie prevented him from reacting too strongly.

All of a sudden, he heard a barely audible murmur come from the cringing redhead. Although the 'shut up, idiot' he got was barely below a whisper and it was almost minute… Archie heard the thick accent that coated the words.

"Yes! You do have it… I didn't mishear it!" Archie yelled, a huge smile of joy stretching across his face as he put both of his large hands on Maxie's shoulders and pulled him away from him to stare at the clearly mortified man. "You do have a Swedish accent! Why didn't you tell me, Max?!"

Accents were always somewhat fascinating to Archie. He figured it was just because the sea pirate in him just loved to hear proof about the old world. Ever since he was a little kid, he remembered when hearing his grandparents talk about the "Old World." It was a time apparently before Pokemon or anything else like that existed. Apparently the world had simply consisted of humans and creatures called 'animals.' Lands like Hoenn and Unova and everything else existed of course, but they certainly hadn't been called that when they were first made up. Nah, they had their own names. He didn't bother remembering a bunch of them admittedly during school (after all, they were dead names now, why bring them up) but he remembered some of them. There had been America, Japan, Sweden, Italy, Russia, and many other countries that divvied up the world back then.

He also had learned about a lot of the bloodshed that had occurred during those times. He didn't know what had been the people of the Old World's problem… but they certainly had bickered and warred with each other a lot. Sure, there were evil groups that wandered around the Pokemon world now… but they were all much tamer than any of these people. Wars, genocide, racism, sexism, and all sorts of other catastrophes were apparently normal to them, like waking up and smelling the breeze was to him.

Apparently their trigger-happy ways with all of their powerful weaponry went too far one day, and cities and countries got decimated from nuclear warfare. Thousands upon thousands of citizens were basically vaporized from the world just like that and the land and earth had begun suffering with them as well. Plants wouldn't grow in patches of land that had once been lush with topiary and animals that had once been prevalent were hanging on the edge of extinction. Clouds darkened the sky, blotting out the sun and nearly half of the water and air in the world was poisoned with nuclear radiation, which of course had horrifying effects on various life forms.

The few people still holding onto life had truly began fearing that humans had finally created the end of the world for good. It was point of hopelessness really.

But like always, humans misunderstood how strong the Earth could really be when it came down to it. It had been a slow and arduous process of course, but the world slowly began to adapt. The surviving humans, learning from their past mistakes, began rebuilding society, making peace amongst what were once warring nations and trying to fix what had been broken. Old wounds had been patched, the toxic waste cleaned slowly but surely, and children were inevitably born.

People migrated and moved like always, building new islands and homes and regions, the same old, same old… which eventually lead to what the lands were now.

The animals that had been struggling for survival in the diseased air also adapted. The weak died away while the new ones developed new growths and powers. For example, mice grew large as rats, learned to walk bipedal when they needed to, grew brighter colorization, and developed the power to conduct electricity and thousands of other evolutionary processes which eventually developed into Pikachu. It was a fascinating process really. Archie remembered being utterly fascinated at a picture of an old mouse that his textbook had and how different it was from a Pikachu… and yet so eerily similar at the same time.

Soon, all the animals developed these likenesses and that got the ball rolling. The humans remained in peace (skirmishes broke out occasionally, as we were humans, but they were all careful not to let it go too far), and used the newly deemed Pokemon as pets, friends, and partners in battle, forming the New World… which seemed to stick permanently.

Although the Old World's customs and habits seemed to wither away, they still remained alive in small ways. Religious traditions for example were still common, of course, as well as some cultural ones. Old songs from the past still managed to survive and were sung to this day and the Pokedex's still compared most of the Pokemon to the animal or device from which they had originated from.

And accents still stuck. It was sometimes common when travelling to different islands and regions to hear the twangs and other such intricacies in the way the people spoke. Of course, they all spoke in a newly set up standard language (therefore communication between everyone was easy) but old languages still remained in some parts and their accents were the proof that the Old World had ever existed in the first place. Most of them had died out long ago though… and even though everyone spoke with twangs, real authentic accents were rare to come by…

And now he found out his boyfriend of all people had one himself… and he had kept it hidden all this time…

Seeming to know he wasn't going to get out of this without a hassle, Maxie let out a sigh and gave up the silent treatment act, hissing, "Because first off, I don't usually speak in this dialect, so it has no reason to come out. Second off, it only comes out when I happen to be angry, thank you very much… and three, I knew you would be obnoxious about it…"

"Who in your family spoke like that?" Archie asked, genuinely curious. He knew Maxie had derived from one of the Orange Islands in Kanto before he had moved to Hoenn to study back when they had been in the same team… and while admittedly he didn't know all that much about the Orange Islands… he never imagined that people of Swedish descent lived over in the area.

Maxie seemed offended at his ignorance, saying, "My whole family… we always have. My father and mother and grandparents and all the others insisted I had to learn how to speak the language and stuff. I really saw no point, seeing as the language is dead and practically useless at this point, but they persisted and I had no choice in the matter. If they had their way, they would've made it so I spoke it constantly, but I prefer to speak the Standard, especially when I need to do business. Honestly though Archie, Courtney and Tabitha know how to speak it too and we have spoken that dialect right in front of you and the other Aqua members. How did you not notice it beforehand?"

Archie flinched at the thought. Tabitha and Courtney knew how to speak it as well? He knew they also came from the Orange Islands with Maxie (when Archie had first been introduced to them, they had been the "Inseparables" and apparently that had stuck when they joined Team Magma), but they also knew how to speak the language. Granted, Courtney didn't speak all that much, but Tabitha never let it slip. Tabitha had the shortest temper out of the three as far as Archie was concerned and he never let it slip. And they had spoken it in front of him? When the hell was this? He wracked his brain and then all of a sudden, a connection did come into his mind.

It had been years ago, around the time Team Aqua and Team Magma had first been created. His team had heard news about Team Magma skirting around the edge of Mount Chimney presumably to do some basic research for a future attack (it seems they were correct about that later on), so he had lead an Aqua patrol to put a stop to any research immediately, hoping to intercept any research or technology the Magmas had brought with them at the time.

He wanted to know what the Magmas were doing officially of course before he just risked some of his grunts and their Pokemon on attacking the other team, so he had sent Shelley and some of the other grunts out to listen in on some of their conversations for a few moments and come back and report what they heard.

He honestly had thought that Shelly and her little group had done a stellar sneaking job (because he swore, Shelly had the feet of a Glameow), but he guess that now that he really thought about it, Magma had always been good guards and obviously, shades of blue didn't camouflage well against brown, grey, and black backgrounds, so at some point, Maxie and his team must have been caught aware of their presence, as when Shelly and the team came back, they insisted that Maxie and Tabitha had been talking gibberish.

Admittedly, he had been mad at them at the time. After all, Maxie was the most well-worded person he knew and all of his workers were usually more well-versed than the average employee, so the idea of Shelly (one of his best workers) and two others insisting they were talking gibberish like a bunch of little kids. So they had to just charge and had a battle that had ended bad for Aqua seeing as Maxie's Camerupt (Artemis) decided to be extra vicious that day and plowed through nearly half of the Aqua's team… and Tabitha's Mightyena hadn't been too easy either. Nor the other Magma grunt…both with their Pokemon and their bare fists. With this newfound knowledge at his hands, he realized that Maxie probably had given his team battle tips for when the Aquas approached, hence why they had such flawless formation.

He made a mental note to apologize for yelling at Shelly and those other grunts so many years ago for not believing them. God, he screwed a lot of innocent admins over back in the day, didn't he?

Deciding to change the subject away from embarrassing defeats and wrongfully-inflicted punishments, Archie leaned over towards Maxie, causing the redhead to take a step back, hissing like a peeved Glameow. "What are you doing, you fish-brained moron?"

Archie grinned and said, "I want you to say something in Swedish to me, Maxie. Come on, prove you can do it."

"Do you think I am going to fall for petty challenges?" Maxie asked him bluntly, arching a thin eyebrow, crossing his arms as if Archie was a dumb child who just tried a really lame ploy to get a cookie. Archie probably wasn't helping this imagery by pouting like he was, but good Arceus, Maxie could be stubborn and difficult. Granted, this probably wasn't helping that Maxie was pissed at him.

Okay, so Archie knew he shouldn't have fed their Mightyenas' all of Maxie's Lava Cookies like he did when Maxie was at the grocery store, but what could he say? Maxie should've known better than to trust him to be the disciplinarian of the Pokemon. The minute he gave them each their morning Lava Cookie (they were to have one in the morning and one in the afternoon), they knew that he would be a sucker if they whined and puppy-eyed him a bit. Soon, he was giving them two… but as they hopped and whined, soon he was allowing them to have as much as they wanted… until it ran out and he realized he had thoroughly just screwed himself over.

Praying to Arceus that Maxie didn't keep stock of how many Lava Cookies there were, he just prayed he could play it off as 'they just suddenly ran out' and nothing more. He didn't know if he would've actually gotten away with it, but unfortunately, he would never be able to find out seeing as a few minutes with Maxie's return, both of the Mightyena's came sauntering in, their ears down and eyes downcast. Maxie noticed how sluggish their moves were and was just about to comment when all of a sudden, his Mightyena vomited on the ground… and soon afterwards, Maxie's followed his example. Yeah, it was a bit hard to hide the fact that he fed the dog-Pokemon all the Lava Cookies when they were regurgitated all over Maxie's clean marble floor.

Let's just say, both him and the Mightyenas suffered Maxie's wrath and even now, Archie still wasn't sure when Maxie would finally let the dog-Pokemon back into the house.

He thought he made it up to Maxie somewhat when he had been the one to clean it up and allowed Maxie to scream at him for a good thirty minutes, but apparently, Maxie was still pissed off about it. This meant he was really going to have to barter in order to get Maxie to agree to do this. Finally, he found something he knew would get Maxie perked up a bit.

"If you do it, then I promise I will muck out your Camerupt's pen for the rest of the year…" Archie offered, knowing that Maxie hated that job to death. He wasn't exactly eager to do it either, but hey, he was a tough guy. He could deal with if it meant he could get Maxie to speak some Swedish to him. He found himself holding his breath as Maxie looked at him curiously, red eyes gleaming curiously as he regarded Archie, obviously trying to determine whether the pirate was telling the truth or not. Archie tried to emulate the best sincere-look he could, hoping it would somehow sway Maxie's decision.

Finally, Maxie let out a sigh and said fluently, "Du luktar fisk. Ta en dusch."

Archie perked up at the sound, admiring the way Maxie could practically say it without thinking. He admired the lilt all the words had, making them seem a lot more elegant and foreign to his ears. Eyes brightening with curiosity, Archie said, "What does that mean?"

"It means: you smell like fish and need to take a shower." Maxie said in a deadpanned tone, turning to go do something else, apparently finding that mere process of conversing with Archie exhausting. Archie gritted his teeth, he supposed he should've known that Maxie wouldn't be kind enough to feed him anything romantic or whatever, but still, what the hell?

Pride slightly wounded, he supposed it was cool just to know that Maxie could speak Swedish. Perhaps he could coax the redhead into saying more later? He sighed and was about to go suck it up and keep to his end of the deal, when Maxie suddenly came sauntering back into the room, scanning through a handful of paperwork for his new geology job. Archie figured that Maxie was only coming back to scold him into cleaning out the pen, but what Maxie said surprised him.

"Archie, if you hurry up and muck out Artemis's pen and get take a proper shower, perhaps I will think about using my language in a more… inventive way and during a more… interesting time." Maxie said coolly, not once glancing up from his paperwork.

Archie stood there dumbfounded, unable to believe his ears…he blinked in gaped shock, probably looking like a Water Pokemon drug out of water, when Maxie shot him out of his daze by saying, "Hurry up before I change my mind."

Archie didn't need to be told twice.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Sorry for the rushed ending. I kind of charged into this having no plot in mind other than 'Maxie speaking Swedish' and then thought, holy shit, how do I end this and yeah. Bleh. Anyhow, this little story was inspired by the idea that one of my friends, Red, and I came up with when we were having one of our many discussions about Hardenshipping, and we thought: what if the different regions in Pokemon all had different ways of speaking. One thing lead to another and yeah... this happened.**

**I hope you enjoyed and critique is always welcome. **


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